Thursday, March 20, 2008

Handling the Hard-To-Handle ADD / ADHD Child.

%%FNAMEFriend%% Is the Dream of parenting your child quickly turning into a nightmare?

Is your ADD Child more difficult to handle than your other kids?

Is every day a struggle?

Parenting and disciplining a child are tough to begin with, but disciplining and parenting the ADD/HD child is even more difficult. Their extra energy, coupled with their impulsiveness and distractability all combine to create a recipe for TOTAL CHAOS & ANARCHY.

Discipline techniques that work for normal kids fail dismally with the ADD child.

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This point was brought home to me when an old friend popped in for a visit and brought her 5 year-old son, Micheal, along.

Her son happily joined my kids in the den whilst my friend Suzie and I settled down to a cup of coffee and a good old fashioned heart to heart.

The peace lasted no more than 2 minutes, when our peace was shattered by the sound of anguished meows and screaming....followed by my son rushing in breathlessly to tell us that Micheal was trying to take the cat for a walk...by pulling it's tail.

Once we had loosened Micheal's vice-like grip on the poor kitty's tail, we settled down to chat again. Our peace was interrupted once again by my son telling us that Micheal was jumping on the sofa (An activity strictly forbidden in my home)

We went down to the den, and my friend Suzie attempted to get Micheal to stop jumping. After several failed attempts, a few of which included dire bodily harm, she eventually had to pick him up kicking and screaming and put him into the car. As she backed out of the driveway, Micheal's tantrum in full swing in the back seat, my mind went back to when my son was 3 years old and the discipline problems I had with him.

I knew what it was like to feel like a failure as a parent, to be humiliated in public by your child's unruly out-of-control behavior.

I thought of how most parenting books offered little practical help in dealing with a child with ADHD. The same techniques that had worked so well for my daughter were totally ineffective with my son.

I also remembered all the trail and error that I had to go through, in order to find parenting and discipline techniques that worked for his unique ADHD temperament.

That night, when my kids were in bed I called Suzie and shared with her some of what I learned. Two weeks later, Suzie called me up.


She sounded so different from the frazzled, overwhelmed mom I had spoken to before. A new sense of calm and confidence was in her voice when she told me "I can't believe it. Micheal is a different kid. I;m amazed that the few simple suggestions that you gave me worked so well. I must admit that at first I was skeptical, I doubted that something so simple could work. But I figured that I had nothing to loose so I tried your suggestions. And I'm amazed. Micheal is calmer, he actually listens and obeys me the very fist time."

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